Green Lantern Ring

As I noted in my last post, I have a ton of crap to do. Today I cleared quite a bit off my desk and am in the process of getting all sorts of things in line. My surgerized puppy can be left alone again so I can actually get out of the house, get to work, and get things done. This is working well and I am happy about clearing off the work desk.

Now I have to clear off the home desk...so to speak.

Report: Back From Flag

I just got back from a great visit with my best friend who lives in Flagstaff, which is about 9 hours away from here. For a while we were VERY far apart distance wise, and now we are a drive! Woo Hoo! It was great! It was fun! But now I'm back. Here's a list of crap I have to do:

1. Clean out the house for the arrival of the hatched parasite.
2. Pay the bills.
3. Register for parasite presents.
4. Get fat while baby grows.
5. Keep the puppy on his physical therapy.
6. Write my dissertation into a book (oh yeah, that was due in January).
7. Write an article with colleague about new research project idea.
8. Write book review (oh yeah, that was due in April).
9. Get instrument together to do 2008 presidential election project.
10. Get 1100 online class together and ready to go on new online program.
11. Take pregnancy classes 3X a week for 2 hours each time.
12. Give birth to and nourish newborn baby and go back to work 3 weeks later.

Clearly it is time to turn on the super-type A-stay up all night Murray power ring...kind of like the green lantern, but better.

Will I ever sleep again?

The Parasite is Doing Well

Yesterday we (the parasite, the infector, and myself) had an appointment. Everything looks great. In fact, she is being so helpful, she is setting up for a planned c-section which means the OCD type A host gets to choose the date of arrival. So far, so good.

Can't wait for August!

Learning the Truth

Some of you may be aware I have been dealing with a surgerized puppy the last couple of weeks. This means he has to be under constant surveillance. A number of my friends have said, good practice for the parasite that is coming. I said, true true. Well, last night I learned something about my spouse that does not bode well for marital happiness post parasite arrival.

Hobbes decided at 230am to bust out of his confinement, let himself around the house and then lick his incision line for about 2 hours. I wake up instantly when he busts out. I stumble out of bed (mind you I am in my third trimester so when I say stumble, I freakin' mean it) and follow him around. A bit of a tussle ensues during which my other puppy, Mac, declares he will sleep in the confinement spot perfectly (why can't he have been the one with the surgery, he'd be so much easier to deal with?!?) and Hobbes declares he will sleep on the bed (btw, he can't jump on furniture). I deal with all of this in the pitch black so as to not disturb my husband who has been SNORING through this whole thing. I then proceed to sit on the floor with Hobbes for 2 hours convincing him that licking is not really in his best interest (husband, snoring) and to please just go back to sleep.

I finally get back to sleep at 430am, but not before I note the indisputable fact that my husband will NEVER wake up in the night with the baby. Clearly a water pistol is needed to break him of that unattractive habit.

My Talk on Television

Last week I was famous for a moment, being interviewed on a local talk show about a Hannity-Anderson debate. I was objective and analytic...because that's who I am when I am being professional. I do not spew my politics as a professor, I NEVER use my expertise as a way to tell people my politics. I never have and I never will.

Interestingly, I have been sent 4-5 emails from conservatives who claim I must be a conservative because I didn't trash Hannity. I've gotten 4-5 emails from liberals who claim I must be a conservative because I didn't trash Hannity. I would love to respond - of course I don't - that Hannity doesn't determine my politics. I may agree with something he says and I may disagree with something he says...but what he says doesn't make me a liberal or conservative.

Trust me, I could trash Hannity with the best of them. I had to pace the room in order to keep my dinner down while I listened to Hannity's presentation. But you see, my disgust at his behavior is personal. Professionally I think he offers something to the world, and as I was being interviewed as an expert in civic engagement/youth in politics I spoke to that point.

That doesn't mean I'm a conservative. That means I'm a good political scientist.

Lawn Care

My husband is supposedly the great lawn care expert. He spent years working at ChemLawn so he knows all the badness of fescue grass and crabgrass and the differences between stuff that looks green but apparently doesn't count as grass. He's very good.

But I feel the need to pick on him a bit here. For the past two weeks he has been stomping around the yard (picking out the fescue grass while stomping) and complaining about how there is no water on our street. He is annoyed, he is angry. "The city will have to reimburse us for our yard when all our grass dies." This quote is interspersed with many swear words. He spent an hour setting up sprinklers that run off our home water and making sure they were getting coverage to all parts of the lawn.

Then yesterday, he turns on the valve that allows water to our house, which apparently it hadn't occurred to him to open two weeks ago. He then looks somewhat sheepish and says, we have water. I say, didn't this happen last year? He just kind of smiles.

I am reminded of the time we bought a subwoofer for him and he and my father were trying to install it and I came into the room and they both said, we need a cord with two heads, the one we have is wrong, I look at the cord and say, aren't these two heads? to which they respond, oh yeah....

Staying Home with the Pup

Oh yeah, so I can't leave my big doggie alone. He has to have constant attention. So here I sit in the 90 degree weather wearing a white trash outfit (don't ask, it's hot, I'm barely clothed) while pregnant watching this puppy.

He's doing very well, although his major problem is he doesn't truly acknowledge he's just had a major knee surgery. I spend a lot of time saying, hey, no, behave, don't do that.

Yesterday I got out and was on the local PBS show "Utah Now." I am so famous. Today I sit here (and my friend just drove by on his little scooter...ciao....and I am thinking hellllllllloooooooooo, stop and talk to meeeeeeeeeeeeeee) in the heat, not famous, bored and miserable...

Hobbes the Stubborn Maniac

Okay.

It's been less than 24 hours since we brought Hobbes home from his major surgery. So here's the deal.

We're supposed to keep him on a leash when he's outside. This morning I walk out with him and Mac decides it would be fun to run up the street and take a walk with some other people who were out. I can't run after him because I am stuck on the other end of the leash of the gimp. That was exciting.

We're supposed to not let him lick. This is very important. They gave us an Elizabethan collar to prevent licking. Hobbes knows how to get this off his head. Thus, I was awake all night listening for the beginnings of licking (as well as husband snoring, cats meowing) so that I could yell at him if there were a problem. (note to self, the parasite kicks a LOT at around 3am)

We're supposed to keep him confined and mellow. This is very important They suggested a crate. I put him in the crate. I take a shower, test run 30 minute confinement. I get out of the shower and Hobbes is sitting on the bathroom floor looking at me with a big old grin (oh yeah, he's not supposed to go up and down the stairs, so he broke that rule as well). I walk up the stairs in my bathrobe and see he has broken the crate (this is not hyperbole, he pulled the walls of the crate down and broke it down - interestingly I hear, and the walls come tumbling down).

I call my vet friends. Matt says some dogs are just not as easy to control. I am thinking, that's the understatement of the century. He says get some sedatives. The vet surgeon calls to see how Hobbes is doing. And then he says the only time this surgery hasn't worked is when a dog went nuts in the crate.

Gulp. This $2000 surgery has turned into lots of money on gates, toys, sedatives, etc etc.

Does anyone want a lame dog???

Puppy Update

Hobbes came out of his surgery just fine. My vet, Dr. E., said I had done a very good job of getting him in very quickly. Apparently most pet parents wait about 2 months before they get in for the surgery. As a result, his knee was not damaged at all and the surgery went well. My husband picks him up today at 2pm. Then the following rules begin.

• No running.
• No jumping.
• No playing with Mac.
• No going outside without a leash.
• No walking.
• No stairs (um, how we're supposed to accomplish this I have NO idea since we have a two level house and we live in both levels).

All of this for 6-8 weeks. Dr. E. said they wouldn't really release him until August 8th and that he couldn't do a real hike until October. So this means for the last three months of my pregnancy (the fattest and most awkward moments of my life) I will be taking care of a dog who in summer would like to be swimming and running and hiking while also taking care of a dog who will expect swimming and running and hiking. What was looking to be a very long summer looks like it is going to be even longer.

Hobbes the Super-Athlete

My puppy, Hobbes, is a super-athlete. How do we know? Well, following are attributes of super-athletes that my puppy displays.

1. Whining diva attitude - Hobbes is the center of the universe and if you don't acknowledge it hourly he will pout or bark at you
2. Short busts of incredible speed - Hobbes can go from pure sleep to pure speed in a split second
3. Put on the DL at the beginning of the season - Hobbes ruptured his cruciate ligament Wednesday

My dog ruptured his cruciate ligament. He was playing in the backyard, planted his foot and spun (I think to catch that elusive invisible football heading straight at him). He immediately started to limp. We, being good puppy parents, ignored it thinking he was being a diva. Two days later we decide we should take him to the vet. So here we go.

• $350 for x ray to determine that the cruciate ligament is ruptured
• $50 for the pain medicine/anti-inflammatory medicine to help him feel better
• $1700 (no that's not a typo, that's $1700) for the knee surgery so he can get back on his feet
• No walks, no hikes, no running around, no going to the bathroom without being walked out on a leash (that's my favorite), no playing

Cheating

Today I discovered a number of my students studying from the final exam - the final exam, mind you! Which means they got the questions to the final exam in advance and are studying from them. (part of me laughed as I was thinking, WTF are you studying? just write down the answers)

Now, for the record, this is an upper division course and I don't care if they memorize the shit, so I give them a guide in advance from which the questions are drawn. So technically I aid in the cheating by giving them a big bunch of questions. These are not MC, so they have to write stuff, and they have to understand it, and I feel that by answering the study guide they actually learn the material (at least, that was my experience in college) so I'm cool with it.

But to actually have the questions. I am nice to my students. I trust them. I let them take the exam any time during exam week. I have said to my colleagues, they wouldn't share questions. They aren't that stupid. Clearly I was wrong. They all turned bright pink and stuttered all over themselves.

No more niceness. Next year, all exams will be proctored. Not by me, but they will have to take the exam at 7am if that's the time, damnit! They'll have to take it during class time.

Students students students.